Monday, June 12, 2006

A1 – Addressing DI Publicly - Richard

Q1: Why do think its important for men like ourselves to publicly address the issues surrounding DI and our own thought and feelings publicly?

Why address our issues publicly? I guess there are a number of reasons for me. I've known about my infertility for only a short period of time and, as a person who likes talking things to death, discussing our decision to use DI with others just sort of came naturally. I think, had I tried to keep quiet about it, it would have eaten away at me from the inside. Talking about it gives me a chance to vent my frustrations, fears, anger and sadness almost like an exorcism. Writing about my experiences act as pressure release valve and helps to keep me sane.

But I guess there is another side to Eric’s question. Why do I think other men should share their feelings about DI in public? Well, because there are a lot more of us out there that can’t bring themselves to do it. Men who live with those fears and frustrations everyday but cannot open their mouths to tell anyone. And it’s not their fault. Society worships fertility and links it inextricably to virility. For those men brought up in families where men don’t cry or show their feelings, telling someone that they are infertile must be practically impossible. Those men deserve a voice and for now, at least, I guess we are that voice.

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